This week’s guest is Keith Matejk of Thunderworks Games. We talk about how you can play Roll Player and Cartographers with big groups of players, and how you can play every Thunderworks game solo. We then dig into the art and gameplay of Goblin Vaults, a strategy card game featuring bidding, card placement, and scoring patterns. Wager cards to win loot from the central cell block, then stash that loot wisely in your vault, earning gears based on the position of cards within that vault. You can also gain gears from scoring objectives that change each game.
With cunning and clever scheming, make your bid to be feared amongst your peers! You’ll need wits and luck to play your cards right as you fill your vault and influence the warden in your favor. After nine rounds, whoever has the most gears wins! Learn to play Goblin Vaults at TheGameBoyGeek.
Dance Dungeon: Water tubes line massive mirrored walls to power the water wheel torture machine. This device has a lever that goes from “little jig” to “dance machine.” Tethers connect goblins to the machine and Lockwork Goblin.
Lockwork Goblin: This colossal goblin-shaped golem, made of thousands of locks of all types, has exterior ledges and steps to climb it if you’re agile enough. It’s lonely and wants friends, so it violently brainwashes goblins with the machine to be its pal and perform dance numbers. In the center of its torso is a prison cell containing goblins pleading for you to save them. Its forehead contains a vault door that leads to emotional baggage and gold. It has hundreds of scraggly teeth that are one-use magic keys that’ll open any lock. When it swallows, it can decide whether the object goes to the head vault or the torso prison.
Dance Goblins: Converted goblins wear red thriller jackets, a lock necklace and are tethered by the head to the Lockwork Goblin. The tether is like an addiction, with strong withdrawals when detached. Rewiring works 100% on goblins, but has a 50% success rate for everyone else.
Art: Tiger Wizard Words: Steve Albertson
Story by: Andrew Bellury, Steve Albertson, Keith Matejk
Appendix N: Princess Bride, viral video of prisoners dancing to Thriller in the Philippines Breakin’, Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo, Inhumanoids (D’Compose), TNMT (Krang), A Clockwork Orange, Project MKUltra (secret government program), Willow, The Manchurian Candidate, Star Wars (Order 66), Shadow of the Colossus, Pulp Fiction.
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Thanks for listening to Season Two of the Epic Levels Mad Dungeon podcast, where D&D hip hop group Epic Levels and a guest create a system-neutral, playable dungeon room using improv, comedy, and lifetimes wasted on roleplaying games.
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The Epic Levels Mad Dungeon podcast is hosted by Andrew Bellury, Rob Bellury & Steve Albertson, and produced by Zach Cowan.
Theme song by Epic Levels and beat by Inner Resting AKA Mason Grant who also makes tabletop games that you can purchase at Gamma Wave Games.
© 2023 Epic Levels. All characters in this adventure–even those based on real people–are entirely fictional.